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Horoscopes from March 26 edition
By Abigail Southworth

Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Don’t forget to step away from your computer once in a while- the TV misses you.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Think about taking a trip. They post contamination orders for a reason.

Gemini ( May 21 – June 21)
Take care of your health- if one glass of wine a day is healthy, 3 or 4 must be phenomenal!

Cancer (June 22 – July 22)
Take a hint from the old lady who swalled the fly: keep your mouth shut

Leo (July 23- Aug 22)
There will be some interesting developments in the love department- cross your finger it’s not your stalker.

Virgo (Aug 23- Sep 22)
You may have your ducks in a row now, but beware of hunting season.

Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22)
Your brainpower’s astonishing. Now’s the time to take on the VCR.

Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21)
Follow your heart, but watch out for traffic signals.

Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21)
Keep it organized, and the remote will remain yours.

Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19)
Beware of being too future oriented- cloning may look promising, but it’s a little early to be selling your organs.

Aquarius (Jan 20- Feb 18)
Be careful not to waste your time- there are too many House episodes left to see!

Pisces (Feb 19 – March 20)
Keep thinking critically. Well, at least thinking.

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